Sunday, January 25, 2009
Caleb
1:16 A.M. I should be half-dead asleep by now but I’ve somehow confused my body by shocking it awake with a grande cup of Starbucks coffee a few hours ago in order to watch a movie with Richelle who is now half-dead asleep while I sit here levitating above my chair. I have a special blue pill for just such occasions.
Sidenote: There’s a giant open bowl of something colorful and seafoody in our fridge and I’m too afraid to investigate closely.
Most people at my school have been celebrating the new Obama administration while I’ve been intentionally trying to keep myself from certain potentially harmful things like knives and sleeping pills and tall buildings. I'll pray for him.
I have not been back to blog lately so this is just me checking back in. Hopefully I won’t stay away so long next time. I have journaled but the journal entries have only served as a painful reminder that I am painfully rusty when it comes to writing so, needless to say, they didn’t quite make the cut.
But there have been things happening lately. My sister Sara had a baby boy named Caleb a couple weeks ago. So there’s things happening in my world.
There was a huge complication with the labor where they almost lost Caleb. While Sara was trying to push, the baby’s heart monitor began to show a weak heart rate which sent the doctors and nurses rushing in to perform an emergency C-section.
Apparently, it had started early on in the pregnancy where Caleb had moved through the womb in such a way that it had produced a knot in the umbilical chord the same way a wire knots up when it gets tangled. The baby was fine as long as he stayed snugly in the womb but as he began to get pushed out in the labor, the chord began to tighten which cut off his oxygen supply. The doctors knew they had about 15 minutes to get the baby out or it would be too late. They were racing Sara down to the operating room so fast that both a doctor and a nurse stumbled and fell on the way. We were told later that Sara’s life was also in jeopardy through this process.
But I’m told the surgeons were spectacular and the C-section worked beautifully and they have a healthy baby boy to prove it.
I was trying to describe the story to Richelle’s Mom this morning and I began to tear up the more I tried to express the story. I realized that I might have lost my sister and I don’t think I’ve done that great of job of telling her how much I love her. I don’t think I’ve said this to her nearly enough.
After work yesterday, Richelle and I faced hours of cattle drive rush hour to visit them getting lost once along the way and accidentally almost visiting San Diego which I’m going to try to erase from my memory. But getting there was worth it.
I was afraid to hold Caleb at first knowing my personal history with handling breakable items. But the more Richelle was holding him and getting pictures with him, I realized I was missing out and asked them to set Caleb in my lap. He was a beautiful 8 pounds with a big shock of brown hair, chubby cheeks and rashy red skin. He squirmed and made a motion to cry when I held him. My mom stepped in and guided me into gently bobbing him up and down.
I think this is how we all are in the arms of a living God. Every cell in our bodies and every cell in the world around us is held in motion by Him. It’s a humbling thought.
Sidenote: There’s a giant open bowl of something colorful and seafoody in our fridge and I’m too afraid to investigate closely.
Most people at my school have been celebrating the new Obama administration while I’ve been intentionally trying to keep myself from certain potentially harmful things like knives and sleeping pills and tall buildings. I'll pray for him.
I have not been back to blog lately so this is just me checking back in. Hopefully I won’t stay away so long next time. I have journaled but the journal entries have only served as a painful reminder that I am painfully rusty when it comes to writing so, needless to say, they didn’t quite make the cut.
But there have been things happening lately. My sister Sara had a baby boy named Caleb a couple weeks ago. So there’s things happening in my world.
There was a huge complication with the labor where they almost lost Caleb. While Sara was trying to push, the baby’s heart monitor began to show a weak heart rate which sent the doctors and nurses rushing in to perform an emergency C-section.
Apparently, it had started early on in the pregnancy where Caleb had moved through the womb in such a way that it had produced a knot in the umbilical chord the same way a wire knots up when it gets tangled. The baby was fine as long as he stayed snugly in the womb but as he began to get pushed out in the labor, the chord began to tighten which cut off his oxygen supply. The doctors knew they had about 15 minutes to get the baby out or it would be too late. They were racing Sara down to the operating room so fast that both a doctor and a nurse stumbled and fell on the way. We were told later that Sara’s life was also in jeopardy through this process.
But I’m told the surgeons were spectacular and the C-section worked beautifully and they have a healthy baby boy to prove it.
I was trying to describe the story to Richelle’s Mom this morning and I began to tear up the more I tried to express the story. I realized that I might have lost my sister and I don’t think I’ve done that great of job of telling her how much I love her. I don’t think I’ve said this to her nearly enough.
After work yesterday, Richelle and I faced hours of cattle drive rush hour to visit them getting lost once along the way and accidentally almost visiting San Diego which I’m going to try to erase from my memory. But getting there was worth it.
I was afraid to hold Caleb at first knowing my personal history with handling breakable items. But the more Richelle was holding him and getting pictures with him, I realized I was missing out and asked them to set Caleb in my lap. He was a beautiful 8 pounds with a big shock of brown hair, chubby cheeks and rashy red skin. He squirmed and made a motion to cry when I held him. My mom stepped in and guided me into gently bobbing him up and down.
I think this is how we all are in the arms of a living God. Every cell in our bodies and every cell in the world around us is held in motion by Him. It’s a humbling thought.
Thursday, January 1, 2009
Gratitude
The financial stress has been weighing down on my mind these days. I keep thinking of the thousand dollars we have left on this tax bill and I can’t seem to figure out exactly how we’re going to make the ends meet on this one. I keep bringing it up in conversations with people and it’s making them end up paying for us in social situations where it’s almost embarrassing to have that happen. Richelle was telling me tonight that I need to be grateful and I know I do but the more I try to make myself be grateful, the more ingratitude I feel. And I’m a big feeler. It’s like I want to feel things more than just think them.
We were just at the movies tonight with our friend Pete and the issue of popcorn came up which immediately made me begin the fight with Richelle.
“I want just the kid’s popcorn box,” she said.
“No no. We can’t afford it,” I said.
So Pete offered to buy it. He said he would buy a big tub and we’d all share it. I was still objecting but I could tell I was losing the fight because I too wanted popcorn so the passion was draining from my mind the more I tried to struggle away. I felt like Al Pacino in Godfather, Part III when he collapsed from a heart attack in his own kitchen, “I tried to get out, but they dragged me back in!”
So I did end up spending more money then I wanted to be spending tonight. Because I felt bad that our friend was having to buy us our popcorn at the movies. I had to help out with the process. Even though the movies somehow figures out how to charge people about twenty times the normal price of the food items. Theatres are now nice enough to allow people to pay in installment plans.
We were just at the movies tonight with our friend Pete and the issue of popcorn came up which immediately made me begin the fight with Richelle.
“I want just the kid’s popcorn box,” she said.
“No no. We can’t afford it,” I said.
So Pete offered to buy it. He said he would buy a big tub and we’d all share it. I was still objecting but I could tell I was losing the fight because I too wanted popcorn so the passion was draining from my mind the more I tried to struggle away. I felt like Al Pacino in Godfather, Part III when he collapsed from a heart attack in his own kitchen, “I tried to get out, but they dragged me back in!”
So I did end up spending more money then I wanted to be spending tonight. Because I felt bad that our friend was having to buy us our popcorn at the movies. I had to help out with the process. Even though the movies somehow figures out how to charge people about twenty times the normal price of the food items. Theatres are now nice enough to allow people to pay in installment plans.
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